I’m Taylor and I chose adoption for my child. He has a great life and wonderful parents, and I’m confident that adoption was the right choice for both of us. To give you a little background information, I moved to Michigan after being born and raised in Wyoming. I knew I needed a change and I honestly picked Michigan by throwing a dart at a map. I guess you could say that I’m pretty adventurous, and I don’t really have the most stable lifestyle. Anyway, I moved to Michigan with a friend. That’s where I met my baby’s father.
I found out I was pregnant after several days of not feeling well. I had gone to an urgent care center to see if they could diagnose my tummy troubles, and after running some bloodwork, they asked me if I knew that I was pregnant. Well, that was quite a shock because, no, I didn’t know that I was pregnant. Then, after having an ultrasound, I was told that I was approximately five months pregnant. I couldn’t believe it.
Well, I knew that I wasn’t going to be able to take care of this child. So, I immediately went online and started looking for an adoption agency. Adoption Associates popped up first in my search and they were highly rated, so I went to the website and requested a phone call. Paula called me and we started talking about the adoption process. The baby’s father was 100% supportive, and we are still good friends to this day. He stuck by me and supported me during the entire process.
After talking with Paula, she connected me with my caseworker, Rosie. Rosie was so great at explaining things and she was so supportive. When it was time to look at profiles, I already had a good idea of who I wanted to be my son’s parents. I had seen them on Adoption Associates’ website and felt really drawn to them.
So, I told Rosie that I was ready to meet Shannon and Carrie. As it turns out, they had been waiting to adopt a child for quite some time. That was actually really important to me. I really wanted to place my baby with a couple who had been waiting for a while and who weren’t able to have biological children.
When I met Shannon and Carrie I knew that they were the right family for my baby. It felt like a perfect match. Even though I had been given many profiles to review, I didn’t feel the need to meet any other couples. Shannon and Carrie lived in another state, and it was during COVID, so we met on Zoom. It was a bit awkward and I was nervous because it was such a big decision, but we ended up getting pretty comfortable with each other. Toward the end of the conversation, Shannon had to leave to go get their dogs from the groomer. One of my stipulations had been that the family have dogs. So, I felt like we had an instant bond because of our mutual love of dogs. We exchanged phone numbers and planned to keep in touch.
About three or four days went by after our first meeting and Carrie texted me asking how I was. We started talking about ourselves and our lives. Carried shared more about the child they lost, and I told her about my daughter. It just felt like we had always been friends. We began talking on a regular basis and built a close relationship – like family.
We spent a few months talking and getting to know each other. The baby was due in early November and I actually had him on my birthday. Carrie was with me the whole time, making sure that I was ok. She really made me feel cared for. When the baby was born, Carrie was the first to hold him. The only one to hold him. I didn’t feel like I could handle the emotions that would come from physical touch so I had decided ahead of time that I didn’t want to hold him when he was born. He was Shannon and Carrie’s baby – not mine. I did deal with a little bit of grief afterwards, but it wasn’t difficult for me because I don’t see him as my son. I felt like a surrogate, like I was meant to have this child for them. He was never meant to be mine.
The first time that I held him was in the AAI office after I released my parental rights in court. He was their son though, so I was able to hold him without fear of being overcome with emotion. Releasing my parental rights in court was probably the most emotional day for me. They tell you what you will be missing, and ask you several times if you’re sure that you want to release. It was hard, but it was the right thing. There was never a point that I thought about changing my mind.
After that, I kind of went back to my life. There were some emotional moments, but Rosie was there to help me. I felt very cared for and supported by AAI. Carrie and Shannon have kept in touch with me and continue to be so supportive. We have a great relationship. I know that I did the right thing for my baby. I gave him two loving parents and a the chance at a better life. Some people think that adoption is selfish, but I know that it’s selfless. I made the decision to place my baby for adoption so he would have the wonderful life that he deserves. No regrets.
