Dear Prospective Birth Parent,

Thank you for your interest in adoption and for choosing life for your unborn child instead of abortion. My name is Nikki, and at age 18 I became pregnant as a result of a sexual assault. Because of the rape, I felt that I could not parent this child, so I looked into planning adoption at the suggestion of my counselor.

Adoption is so different than it used to be. A birth mother can choose the family, and there can be contact after the child’s birth. I had certain criteria that I wanted in a family. Because of my faith, I wanted a Christian couple, with no children, and a stable marriage. I also wanted a couple who had similar looks to myself and the birth father, because it was important to me that this child fit into this family. I met with my child’s parents three times before she was born. They also met my family, because my family is very important to me and I wanted them to be involved in my decision.

I made my adoption decision early enough in my pregnancy so that, when I delivered a healthy baby girl, I was emotionally and physically prepared to let her go to a loving, childless family. Still, going home from the hospital with empty arms was very difficult, but I knew that she was in the arms of a wonderful family who could provide her with so much more that I could. Today I am a 24-year-old who thanks God for allowing me the opportunity to bring such joy to a childless couple.

Since placing my child, I have married and gone on to college to receive a degree in Sociology. I think of my child from time to time, and I receive pictures and a letter from her parents every year on her birthday. I know I made the best decision for me and for her. Adoption is a difficult decision. It takes a lot of courage and love to carry a child for nine months and then release that child so he or she can be raised by someone else. I respect you for whatever decision you make. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

High school student
Victim of sexual assault